Arthur the cat

so the other day i bought a packet of plastic cats
one of them was black and white with green eyes and i called him arthur
i love him so much
he's in a very happy, loving gay relationship with one of my other cats, patrick. although he is afraid what the conservative leader of the cats' small township, henrietta, would think of his love with patrick, even though patrick isn't and doesn't care. he uses his best friend bordois as his beard. bordois is a whore so she doesn't mind. but she's not as much of a whore as benedict who sleeps with anything with legs, including chairs. and tables. and his cousin, who he knew was his cousin, but she didn't know. and then she did. and it was awkward for poor georgina (she wants to be called george though because she is a closet transgender) who now has social issues. and she sees a psychiatrist whose name is edmund. edmund has a low-wage job and a twin brother called edward who is autistic and selectively mute. he hates his job but keeps it so he can continue to take care of his brother. his other client is prudence who has anger issues and burned down her mother's house. and her mother. when she was six. edmund is in love with lady victoria, and she is the only person besides him who can get edward to speak. he keeps his love to himself because lady victoria is affianced to lord albert and pregnant with his child. lord albert is a snob and the grandson of henrietta and the heir to the township. he is destined to become the mayor when she dies. he is always trying to impress his grandmother and keeps his beliefs the same as hers, which is part of the reason he is so cranky all the time, because he has secret feelings for benedict that he can't act on because his grandmother would disown him and he would feel dirty and wrong.

ah, the imagination of a child.